You’ve managed to get a date with a girl that you really want to impress. We got together a survey of over a hundred women to find out what flies and what doesn’t on dates. We found out that there are some things do with the best intentions that chicks just don’t like. Before you start making plans you should check out these four mistakes and steer clear.
Spending too Much
A lot of times a guy wants to really wow his first date. So he makes plans to take her to a super expensive place to eat and then to enjoy a pricy entertainment item. It makes sense at first; put your best foot forward and all. But the problem is that your best foot isn’t really the ″real″ foot. You’re setting her up for unrealistic expectations and setting yourself up for credit card debt if this keeps up. Also, she may not be a fancy club sort of girl. It’s best to keep it to something nice but within your means as a first date.
Doing too Much
Taking a girl to lunch, zip lining, ice skating, dinner, and then a concert is just exhausting. Loading you date up with too many activities is going to overwhelm her. Also, if you plan too many events to take place during your date you take the focus off the date. Taking a girl on any one of those things is great, but try to keep it to just one with lunch or dinner. You want to learn about the woman you’re going out with, after all. Also, if you load your first date up, what are you going to do on your next one?
Not Talking About Yourself
Women get uncomfortable with one sided conversation. They want to talk, but they want to listen too. Make sure that if there are silences in the conversation that you cut in with something about yourself. You don’t have to tell a girl all the details of your life, but admitting that you loved the Pirates of Dark Water when you were a kid isn’t that. If you don’t talk to a girl through the whole date then she’s going to think that you’re not into her. That means she’s not very likely to become a repeat date.
Missing Non-Verbal Cues
Men are really bad at reading women’s body language. If we’d pay more attention we’d understand things better. When a woman refuses to make eye contact she’s feeling slightly intimidated. If she crosses her arms and turns so her shoulder is facing you, you are making her uncomfortable. Women also slouch and make themselves seem smaller when they aren’t feeling secure. If you catch your date doing any of these things, back off. Change the conversation or say ″I’m sorry, am I making you uncomfortable?″. If you ask that, don’t blame her for her discomfort. Instead, try to not do it again.
There is a good middle ground for first dates that is somewhere between overload and nothing at all. That space is not too difficult to find as long as you approach dating pragmatically. Remember that the first date is a getting to know you event. Don’t feel like you have to pull out all of your tricks. Save something for next time.